“Successful life”
Successful life. It’s a comment that I hear often and that makes me cringe every time, and more so now than ever. “Success” is often defined by certain “things” that we acquire or societal goals that we have achieved. Having this year’s great car is one of those signs of success. And in the same vein, the Car-House-Child-Cabin-Big Job-Second Car – Ect series is one of them. Social pressure, which leads to what I call Social Stress, is one of the biggest stresses that humans experience. And this pressure often leads to several life dramas like, physical and mental illnesses, divorce, depression, suicide. The desire to perform in order to acquire the items on the “Lifetime Achievement” list is ubiquitous in everything we do, and that same desire leads us directly to the side effects of stress.
“What will happen in 5 or 10 years…”
But beware, we humans are not all equal. Many are under social stress and seem to have no difficulty in maneuvering in this context. Or at least, they show no immediate noticeable signs. What will happen in 5 or 10 years… no one knows. I am on the other side. One that encompasses those for whom Social Stress has caused immediate and noxious deep scratches. You see, I was one of those who yearned for that bucolic life that only a certain number of objects, a certain number in my bank account, an untold number of friends or a certain social status would bring me. And even though I thought I was different, away from this scourge, reality eventually caught up with me. (If you have not read my first three articles From the beginning, Moving On and The RedPill, you may know what I mean. (If you haven’t read them, have a look.)
I am far from being alone with the consequences of stress and anxiety. The World Health Organization (WHO) estimates that around the globe, about 3.6% of people struggle with anxiety problems, or about 264 million people. Global organizations also confirm that cases of stress and anxiety are increasing rapidly from year to year. The 21st century is coming with a sharp rise in cases, and these statistics were taken before the COVIT-19 crisis, so imagine! More and more researchers, scientists, doctors and others directly associate stress and anxiety with several cardiovascular diseases, attention deficit, obesity, and the list goes on.
“We dream of travels, vacations and explorations…”
So, Social Stress follows us, and we, one day, find ourselves with a multitude of accumulated luggage in the garage, the basement, the warehouse … and the head. The big problem with all of this is that in order to achieve or maintain the coveted social status, one must have monetary income accordingly. So there are no options of leaving the workplace before reaching the magic retirement number, the one that will theoretically allow us to “live happily” according to social criterias. The beautiful magic formula used by financial advisers that says that when you retire, your income generated from your savings should be at least 80% of the sum of your salary by the time you retire. Nice theory. Imagine what percentage of people achieve this goal? Very small. In fact, a study by Scotiabank in Canada found that only 68% of Canadians save for retirement and only 70% of those same Canadians believe that once retired, they will not have enough money to maintain an active life. So we continue to work until 65, 70 years old. We dream of travels, vacations and explorations and all that and we repeat the sentence that kills: “once I retire, I will do all that!” FALSE !!! In my opinion, there is a major problem with the way we do things. We spend the best 40 years of our life at work, from 20 to 60 years old and then, with the energy and health that we have left, we take a retirement which risks being rather sedentary if, during these 40 years of work , we have not taken good care of our physical and mental health and Social Stress has already taken its toll.
“...stress can be decreased, eliminated or even avoided altogether by adopting a healthier lifestyle…”
And yet, stress, whether social or otherwise, as well as anxiety, are conditions that can be treated and even avoided in rather simple ways. You don’t get stress like a virus. Anxiety is not contagious. Yes, these two conditions are sometimes inherited but it is not automatic. And unlike most physical or mental health conditions that require medication treatment, stress can be decreased, eliminated or even avoided altogether by adopting a healthier lifestyle, adding certain physical and mental activities to our daily routine.
Adjust your diet with healthier products and avoid already prepared meals. Do light physical exercise, 10-15 minutes a day, 5 times a week and add a daily 10-15 minutes of meditation to calm the mind and bring focus back at the right place. This is not a miracle cure and I am not making any claims that anyone with stress or anxiety can solve their problems with this simple formula. But if we adopt these practices in a preventive fashion, before the acute symptoms and side effects of stress have already surfaced, we are putting the odds in our favor. The human brain is fascinating and extremely powerful. It can create the negative mental and physical conditions, but it can also do the opposite and work for us positively, if guided in this direction. We just need to tap into these abilities a little more than we are used to and not be afraid to look further.
“...stress can be decreased, eliminated or even avoided altogether by adopting a healthier lifestyle…”
And above all, never forget this. If you are in a situation where you are under tremendous stress causing anxiety, whether at the workplace, within your family or social environment, act quickly. Don’t let the situation persist or worse yet, deteriorate. Ask for help from those close to you or from organizations or support groups. Sometimes we get bogged down so deep in the abyss of depression or anxiety that the light at the end of the tunnel is not visible from where we are. Help from a third party outside the situation is completely impartial and will be of great support. Don’t be afraid to ask for help. To some, asking for help or even admitting of a mental condition may seem weak or embarrassing. In reality, it is quite the opposite. Facing a situation and wanting to get out of it is a sign of courage and determination. In addition, it is even more dangerous to isolate yourself when you feel in a troubled period. And the more you isolate yourself, the more difficult it becomes to ask for help. In some cases, the stress that leads to depression can lead to violence against others or against oneself.
This is just a glimpse of what stress and anxiety can cause. Not to be taken lightly …
